The Five

Relationship Girl is all about finding The One. Single Chick gets better numbers --she is allowed The Five. Everyone is familiar with this game -- five people that you would get a pass to sleep with should the opportunity ever present itself. The Five usually consist of unattainable celebrities and so a certain comfort level is afforded even if you end up playing this game with The One. (Note: The Five should NEVER include anyone he knows personally. Bad form.)

SC started out picking the usual:
1. Brad Pitt
2. George Clooney
3. Johnny Depp
4. Matthew McConaughey
5. Bob Dylan

OK, so Bob Dylan probably is not on the standard list but sleeping with a legend is sleeping with a legend and, quite frankly, I think he's brilliant and worth my last slot. Hockey Boy started his list with the gorgeous Halle Berry and added Keira Knightley when I added Johnny Depp (it was the end of a 3 day Pirates2 viewing -- there were... ahem...distractions along the way) and I almost thought about giving Keira a spot on my 5 as well... (Brad Pitt ? I could bump him off I suppose)...and she does have that fantastic accent... but instead I decided to revise my list a little....stray from the norm. Seriously, how can I have a 5 List with no artists or musicians? And so here is my revised updated list (with a lot of help from Relationship Girl):

1. Albert Einstein - yes, I know he is dead but my chances in reality are every bit as good with him as with George Clooney. I just think Al might be a bit of fun to hang out with. "Imagination is more important than knowledge... " I think he might have had a fun wild streak... besides smart is sexy.

2. Leonardo - not DiCaprio -- da Vinci - Sure, he didn't star in Titanic but he DID invent the helicopter in the 1500s! (Did I say smart is sexy?). Normally, I'm not attracted to a guy with that much facial hair. Of course, I would love to spend the early morning hours under the sheets talking about light and art and painting and sculpting and find out if he really liked Dan Brown's book.

3.Bob Dylan - Yeah, he's staying on the list. I don't have to explain it again. It's my list.

4. Frank Sinatra - I have a thing for blue eyes... and men who look good in expensive suits... and drink martinis...

5. David Beckham - Hey, I AM a girl. Gotta have one athletic hottie with a nice butt.

Okay...so the revised SC list is every bit as fantastical as the original list and I'm not sure if three dead guys and one 66 year old rocker makes Hockey Boy feel any better.... but he still has Keira and Halle and they should be able to get him through... besides, he stands a pretty decent chance of being on RG's shorter list...

Dualing Me

I have been kinda sorta dating again for a few years now. I am exhausted. I have cyber-dated, been hooked up by well-meaning friends and picked guys up in bars. I am torn, like most women dating in their 40s, by the fact that Relationship Girl and Single Chick (my two innner/alter egos) cannot agree on what I want in a man. You would think it would be the same thing....and yet....it doesn't seem to work that way....for example:

Relationship Girl want someone who will take her hand in public, hold her chair and open her doors. Single Chick is hoping someone will grab her ass and whisper lewd suggestions for later fun and games.

RG wants to share a glass of wine with a nice guy on the porch during a rainstorm. SC wants to drink Ghetto cosmos and shoot whiskey with beer chasers with a guy who can remember the punch line to a dirty joke.

RG wants to wake up and find a love note from her man on the nightstand. SC wants to wake up and follow the trail of her clothes back out into the living room...kitchen....um... front door.

RG wants to meet all his friends and bond with them as The One He Adores. SC wonders how many of his friends will actually hit on her while he's in the bathroom.

RG is looking for a guy with great eyes, a soft voice who tells her that he can see being The One in her life. SC is wants a guy with a nice butt, a flirty, wicked attitude who tells her that he can't wait to see her naked.

Relationship girl has been looking for awhile for The One (though she continues to tell everyone that she isn't). Single Chick hopes that The One can keep up with her (knowing that he can't be The One if he can't).

My eternal optimism keeps me believing that The One is out there somewhere (perhaps in a condo by the beach)... and he is looking for The One He Adores (instead of The One Who Stalks)... that he has his own Relationship Guy and Single Dude battles to deal with... I think it might be nice to double date with them.